Clearly the fish and chips across the road is where it's at - who'd have guessed. I popped in to ask the nice Polish man if he would mind taking a delivery for me. I also ordered a veggie burger, because it seems wrong to only ever come in to beg favours (he has taken my deliveries before, and once rescued me when I was locked in my flat having left the keys inside my car, but that's another story).
I got a free cup of tea and a great dollop of unexpected flirtation: I was propositioned by two men in quick succession. The nice Polish man is always attentive - much eye contact, flashing smiles and effusive "sooo nice to see you" - but super polite. The second, however, was brazenly persistent. "Hello you sexy", he said in broken, heavily accented English, accompanied by an intense stare. "Want to go out? You have boyfriend?" Rather startled, I thanked him for the offer but pointed out I actually have a husband. Undeterred, he offered: "Is no problem. You can have other husband."
Coo-er. Saying you are married sends most chaps spinning 180-degrees and quick march, but not this one. He took his chips and swung out the door, still blithely trying: "I give you my number? We have drink?"
As I waited for my veggie burger I couldn't help wondering - lovely though it is to be asked - if perhaps the Ocean Blue of Datchet it is not really a takeaway after all, but some kind of covert dating agency, or worse. It would be ungracious to discuss the calibre of the suitors, but if you are open to options, I say to all the single ladies: give it a whirl. It does wonders for one's self-esteem, if nothing else - and the chips are fantastic, too.
When my food arrived, the nice Polish man asked: "You want sauce with that?" I think I've already had plenty, thanks :)
